Couple Trouble
by Shadow of Intent
Summary: Multiple pairings with some lolz. dominance issues, cactus fun, and fluff If anyone has a request for a pairing for my next fic message me. xD


**Instead of completing the periods chemistry test like I was supposed to I took the time writing this. (My second year of chem and I still haven't learned my lesson xD). Sorta short, definitely dirty, and it was worth the lolz and bitch slap from the girl sitting next to me wanting to shut me up. SEND ME A MESSAGE OR LEAVE A REVIEW IF THERE ARE ANY WEIRD PAIRINGS YOU ARE CRAVING AND CAN'T FIND, or just leave sum happy comments. ENJOY! :D**

**Dissidia belongs to Square Enix… (Exdeath's moves are a load of crap)**

**Mateus/Firion (Smut)  
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>"You know, I think you would look much better with a collar on."<p>

Firion immediately glared at his imperial lover.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"Don't get upset, I think it would suit you nicely seeing that I am the dominant one of the relationship after all. And to let others around know you belong to me just in case they get any ideas."

Firion grit his teeth irritably, not before letting a sickening sweet smile form on his lips seconds later.

"Sure, why not?"

The Emperor's eyes widened instantly.

"What?"

"Why not? I think it would be perfect for a submissive bitch like me," Firion said in a sexy tone while giving the emperor a playful look.

Mateus could not believe what he was hearing from his usual defiant lover. He didn't know whether to question the teenager if he had hit his head recently or if he was just kidding around. But the moment Firion decided to get on his knees in front of him and stick his tongue out in naughty matter, he summoned a gold collar which had 'property of Mateus' embedded on it without thinking twice and moved to put it around his lover's neck.

"Wait, do you have a leash too? You can take me for a walk, and I wouldn't be much of a submissive bitch without one." Firion suggested beginning to undo his top while the blonde found himself beginning to drool a bit and growing rather hard down below.

"What a lovely idea, I'm glad your finally seeing things my way for a change love." A leather leash was summoned seconds later, but before the blonde could even attempt to put them on the teenager, he found himself hunching over when a fist connected with his stomach suddenly.

Firion let out a battle cry as he quickly turned the situation in his favor by slamming the emperor onto the ground and jumping on his back to prevent him from escaping. He then quickly grabbed a hold of the collar and leash and began working it on his lover's neck.

"WHY YOU DIRTY INSOLENT BRAT! HOW DARE YOU DO SOMETHING LIKE THIS TO-GAHH!"

"Shut it bitch" Firion growled as he pulled at the collar with the leash roughly that was now around the other's neck, causing him to choke a bit. "Get up now," he didn't even wait for the blonde to respond as he got up off of him and sat down, forcibly yanking the other to sit on his lap.

"What are you doing? I will not accept thi-Ahh!" The emperor suddenly let out a choked gasp at the feeling of a hand in his pants grabbing at his already stiff member now.

"You just don't know when to shut up do you?" Firion growled again and yanked the leash harder causing his disobedient lover to arch against his chest as he continued to pump him with his other hand.

"F-firion p-please, I'm sorry. I'll never refer to you as if you're below me again; just get this damn thing off me! Its degrading and anyone could be walking around these parts!"

Ignoring his pleas, the weapon specialist nipped at one of his ears and traced it with his tongue. "How does it feel being the bitch for once your majesty? Not the kind of throne you'd imagine yourself sitting on for a change didn't you?"

"Firion please, I'll die if any of chaos warriors see me like this."

"I don't care. I'm not stopping until you scream my name as loud as you can."

"I will not!" The Emperor gasped in pleasure as his member was roughly yanked at and the mouth continued to work at his ear, slowly moving his down to his neck.

"C'mon Mateus, scream for me and I'll get us out of here. Or maybe the little bitch just needs some help? Such a disobedient dog, but I can fix that!" putting the leash in his mouth, he used his now free hand to help the other continue pumping the throbbing member below, before moving it lower to fondle the sack.

"Ahhh Fir-mmphh" The Emperor bit his bottom lip hard in attempt to stop himself from moaning louder, which was becoming hard as he came closer to release.

"Scream it Mateus, let everyone know out there that I'm in charge right now!" Spitting out the leash, Firion quickly pushed the Emperor off of him, causing the other to stand on all fours and easily allowing him to rip off the other's violet pants in a rush before wrapping his arms around his waist and continuing his assault on weeping cock below. He soon found himself dry humping his ass as Mateus finally gave in, screaming his name over and over while he simply bit his shoulder and brought him closer to orgasm.

Though the fun suddenly came to a halt when loud gasps of shock caused Firion to stop his movements.

"OH MY GOD FIRION WHAT THE HELL!"

"DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY MOOGLES LIVE AROUND HERE?"

"Oh man Sephiroth would have loved this!"

Firion looked up to find Zidane, Luneth, and Cloud standing not too far away from gawking at him. Firion released his mouth from his lover and glared at the trio.

"Can't you assholes see I'm busy? Oh I get it; you guys want a front view of this bitch, no problem!" Firion immediately stood up; bringing the now dazed out Emperor with him and grabbed a hold of his dripping member to make sure they could get a good look at it.

"YOU SEE THIS? THIS IS MINE! THIS IS WHAT IM GOING TO SMACK YOU IN THE FACE WITH WHEN YOU SLEEP TONIGHT AS A REMINDER OF WHAT YOU ALL MISSED OUT ON! COME NEAR HIM AND I'LL SHOVE MY STAFF SO FAR UP YOUR ASS YOU'LL BE SPITTING THE FIRA SPELLS! YOU HEAR ME?"

As Firion began laughing like a maniac the trio quickly took off without looking back while sobbing about not wanting cum stains on their faces. **(Not that it's possible anyway xD)**

Later that night, the 'Mateus' on the gold collar had ended up turning into 'Firion.'

**Exdeath/Prishe (wtf)**

Exdeath sat and held his armored face in both hands at one side of the bed while Prishe sat on the other side with her arms across her chest.

"I-I'm sorry, this has never happened to me before."

Prishe turned her head to glare at him," Having a cactus with spikes as long as your fingers for a penis never happened to you before!"

"I don't know I'm a tree for god sakes! Excuse me for not having the capability to sprout a proper erection. I hardly get any sunlight as it is due to this armor and all."

"Then why the hell did you ask me to come with you?"

Exdeath played with his fingers a bit, "Err, because I thought you seemed like the 'Tree-hugging' type."

"..."

"I'm surprised you didn't come up with some sort of spell to help you grow one. Isn't magic uh...your specialty?"

"Hmm, I never thought of it like that. Maybe I will give it a try later on."

"Ugh, then what are we supposed to do until then?"

"We could use this," Exdeath suggested and held up a fat cucumber.

"Cover it with peanut butter and you got a second date." Prishe replied instantly before tackling him to the mattress and began grinding against his armored hips.

**Yuna/Tidus/Gilgamesh/Jecht (good parenting…lol)**

"I'm sorry Tidus; I'm just not feeling that spark we had back in Spira."

Tidus removed himself from Yuna's body and sat next to her, "No, I'm sorry. I'm the one not pleasing you right. I guess my old man was right about me." He sighed sadly.

"N-no don't say that! You did everything right!" She immediately rested her head against his bare shoulder and kissed his neck. "I just meant it could use a little more excitement. Laguna and Cloud of Darkness seem to never have any problems; maybe we should ask them for some ideas?"

Tidus shivered at the thought. He doubted Laguna's fetish for shoving bullets in all the very wrong places and CoD's hobby of whipping someone raw and bloody with her tentacles would spice up their sex life in the slightest.

"Err, why don't we just try summon stones? Some tentacle rape with Ultros or an orgy with the Magnus sisters found fun?" Tidus grinned while Yuna immediately whacked him with a pillow.

"Okay then, how about some naughty role playing?"

"Only if you do the Emperor," Yuna grinned while he gagged in disgust.

"To hell with that! Ahh I give up!" Tidus let his head drop in despair while Yuna began rubbing his back in a comforting matter.

"I don't know then…Oh! Maybe we could try some toys?"

CRASH!

The couple screamed and wrapped their arms around each other in freight as the wall in front of their bed came tumbling down. Moments later Gilgamesh, with a box of sex toys at hand, walked in along with Jecht following close beside him.

"You called at the right moment kid; I'll finish the job in no time!" Gilgamesh immediately pulled out a mace covered with vibrating dildos.

Jecht on the other hand just dropped his shorts and laughed evilly, "Stand aside crybaby, I'm gonna show you how to really tame that ass."

As the grinning perverts got closer, the couple immediately began to shake in fear.

"Yuna, let's just stick with your Aeons from now on ok?"

**Ultimecia/Squall (Time for sum fluff :3)**

"Why do you always time freeze before I can orgasm? It gets really annoying after a while…"

"Because out of all the amazing things you're capable of doing Squall, this had to be the one thing your fast at? Where is the fun in that for me?"

Squall rolled his eyes, "You can't just speed up time for yourself?"

"Hmm, I suppose I could give that a try. But where would the fun be in that for you? I don't want you left feeling unpleased if I end up pushing you off."

"You could always blow me." Squall smirked.

Ultimecia put a hand on her hip, "You know I never enjoyed doing that sort of thing."

Squall sighed and began digging through one of his pockets, "Then I guess you won't be wanting this then?" He replied then removed a small velvet box which held a small silver ring with a crimson diamond.

Ultimecia gasped before covering her mouth, "Why Squall, You shouldn't have. I'm sorry but I don't know if I can accept it."

Squall rolled his eyes again. "You know I care about you, and to be honest I rather put up with your time fetishes then Rinoa's bullshit sunshine personality."

"I don't know Squall…Even after I tried taking over your home, had Seifer sexually assault you, and nearly killed all your friends?"

"Look it's either me or that fat fuck Cid."

"SOLD!" Ultimecia instantly wrapped her arms around Squall's neck and pressed her lips to his, which in the end led the Lion to pulling her tightly in his arms and eagerly returning the love.

**END…For now.**

**Sorry that I haven't written anything new in a while or updated on some of my old stories. Again those will be put on hold until further notice, but if anyone wants me to do another fic like this send me a message** **and post a pairing. I'll see what I can come up with. ;D Kuja/Jecht is a new fav of mine.**


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